Dean and Jerry were riding a train across the west.
Jerry looked out the window and saw a whole lot
of buffalo roaming the range.
Look at that big bunch of buffalo said Jerry.
Dean: Don’t say bunch say herd.
Jerry: Heard what.
Dean: Herd of buffalo.
Jerry: Sure I’ve heard of buffalo.
Dean: No... you don’t understand, a buffalo herd.
Jerry: I don’t care what a buffalo heard
I ain”t said nothing that I’m ashamed of.
Q. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs under a car?
A. Jack!
Three Irishmen, Paddy, Sean and Seamus, were stumbling home from the pub late one night and found themselves on the road which led past the old graveyard.
"Come have a look over here," says Paddy, "It's Michael O'Grady's grave, and God bless his soul. He lived to the ripe old age of 87."
"That's nothing," says Sean, "here's one named Patrick O'Tool, it says here that he was 95 when he died." Just then, Seamus yells out, "Hey, here's a fella that got to be 145!"
"What was his name?" asks Paddy. Seamus stumbles around a bit, awkwardly lights a match to see what else is written on the stone marker, and exclaims, "Miles, from Dublin."
Q. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs under a car?
A. Jack!