How many cups of coffee will this hold?” the man asked as he placed a large thermos on the lunchroom counter.
“Six cups,” advised the waitress.
“Fine,” replied the man. “Give me two cups regular, two cups black, and two with extra cream."
On the way to lunch, a teacher spotted two boys playfully fighting. She asked one of the boys to go to the back of the line and he came back right after.
”Why aren't you at the end of the line?" asked the teacher.
The boy replied, "I couldn't, someone was already there."
To celebrate their silver anniversary, a couple went to Niagara Falls and asked a motel clerk for a room. "We only have the honeymoon suite available," the clerk told them.
"My wife and I've been married 25 year," the man said. "We don't need the honeymoon suite."
"Look, buddy," replied the clerk. "I might rent you Yankee Stadium, but you don't have to play baseball in it!"
Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.